Session FAQ
You do not need to have any prior experience in ropes/shibari/BDSM
All bodies belong in rope and there aren’t any specific skills that make you a better or worse bottom in ropes. I have tied plenty of clients who are exploring ropes for the first time and I’m happy to create a session that fits your experience level and risk profile. During my intake process we'll discuss desires, boundaries and safety before beginning.
What does kinbaku/shibari/ropes feel like in a physical sense?
Ropes can feel a lot of different ways depending on how we tie, what the intentions are, and even the way you feel in your body day to day. I’m usually told after sessions it felt like sinking into an intense massage. Ropes can feel soft and caressing, as well as impactful and aggressive. It’s a beautiful space to explore the contradictions that exist in our daily life.
If we explore suspension in some manner you will experience something physically intense. Sometimes this can feel like breathy compression in the chest or a slow sinking pain as your body sinks into the ropes.
I can always make space to talk about this more in detail before our session to help you feel at ease stepping into this experience.
What about safety?
Rope is inherently dangerous. Before we tie we will talk about risk and nerve safety, including some things I’ll ask you to be aware of while tying. I recommend watching this video series to help with some basic knowledge and we’ll talk more in depth once you’re here for a session. You can also find more info in The Rope Bottoms Guide by Clover and Basics for Bottoms
Despite taking good consideration and doing my best to keep you safe, agreeing to be tied or doing a BDSM scene with someone no matter if it is a professional or in private always comes with a certain risk!
Different types of ties carry different risk levels and it is perfectly fine to prefer a low(er) risk level
As a consenting adult you agree to some degree of risk and to communicate both before and during the session if something feels wrong. If you agree to sessioning with me you agree to RACK – risk aware consensual kink. No person, no matter experience level can with 100% certainty ensure nothing will go wrong but with clear communication and awareness the risk becomes significantly smaller!
Do you accept people with trauma?
I’m do not have official training in trauma support but I’m happy to discuss potential triggers and I’m equipped to hold space for you if anything comes up. I strive to provide a safe trauma aware space and I’m often reading up/learning about ways to do this better.
Does the session have to be sexual in nature?
Absolutely not. I find that even the silliest sessions exist in a realm of intimacy with erotic undertones, but this is simply due to closeness and the way we place ropes on the body. I am very comfortable providing a platonic tying experience. That said, if you’re looking for a more sexual session we can work together to find a way I can provide that within my own boundaries and safety. I will never tie, touch, or expose parts of your body without explicit consent. Oftentimes rope is an outlet for erotic fantasy and I’m happy to include other ideas in our sessions such as: being blindfolded, using other toys, being undressed, gagged or stepped on. Though often just the act of being tied is enough.
We negotiate these aspects beforehand and you can always ask to revoke consent once the session started, in case you change your mind.
Does it cost extra if additional elements like mentioned above are included?
This depends what it is but yes, sometimes. Email me about this and we can discuss in more detail.
Can you take photos during?
I’m happy to provide photos during the session. Typically these will just be moments that I’ve stepped back to observe what's going on and tend to be rather candid moments. If you would like a photo focused session please book a photoshoot with me or message me ahead of time and we can discuss how to make this work for you.
Can I bring a friend to watch?
I’m happy to make space for someone you trust to be there when you are tied. This can change the atmosphere of the session but again this is not a problem for me.
How can I vet you?
Please do! I’m public with my practice and please reach out to anyone you’ve seen me work with. I’m happy to provide some resources for you but I encourage you to ask around yourself as well since it would be less biased than me picking folks for you.
What about aftercare
I will always strive to provide aftercare for you once the session is done. There’s specifically a question about this on my intake form. If you ask for something I’m unable to provide I will let you know beforehand and we can work together to come up with an alternative that works for you. I can also check in after the session and make sure things are feeling good a few days later as well as being open to hearing from you if thoughts come up in the days following a session.